REVIEW: Diary of a Wimpy Kid The Long Haul (AKA the worst road trip ever)

Kinney, J.  (2014).  Diary of a Wimpy Kid:  The long haul.  New York:  Abrams.

217 pages.


Appetizer:  Inspired by a Family Frolic magazine article, Greg's mom has required the entire family go on a road trip together.  The adventure that ensues will prove harrowing for poor Greg and will feature a piglet, hungry seagulls, a trip to a vet, underpants bandits, lost keys, and a lack of space in the back of the van.

I laughed out loud a few times while reading The Long Haul, which is a step up from several of the previous Wimpy Kid books.  I really liked the description of Choose Your Own Adventure books and Greg feeling like he was faced with a similar choice.  (Although, this element did make me feel like the end of the book lacked a conclusion.  I kept turning the last page back and forth to see what I was missing.)

I also liked the family trip to the vet's office (see the last two pictures below).

This book left me feeling pleased that I don't have any road trips scheduled for awhile....


Dinner Conversation:

Tasty Rating:  !!!

REVIEW: Black Hole Sun

Gill, D.M.  (2010).  Black Hole Sun.  New York:  Greenwillow Books.

340 pages.


Appetizer:  I'm having an exceptionally difficult time figuring out how to describe this book.  It's one of those books in which the actual plot doesn't become apparent until about 100 pages in and when you describe it, you don't want to ignore those first 100 pages entirely.  I think the book jacket blurb person had trouble too:

Durango is playing the cards he was dealt.  And it's not a good hand.

He's lost his family.

He's lost his crew.

And he's got the scars to prove it.

You don't want to mess with Durango.

No, I imagine I don't want to mess with Durango.
But what does that mean?  What is this book about?  Except from an angry boy with scars who I don't want to mess with?

Here's my best try:  Durango lives on Mars.  Mars is a stinky place (literally and figuratively).  An outsider, Durango works as a regulator to try to restore justice.  He has an artificial intelligence implant that is named Mimi and that talks to him and is almost always sarcastic (Love her!).  And he kinda-sorta, maybe, likes/loves Vienne, the girl who works for him.  But their relationship is purely professional.  It'd be wrong to let her know how he feels.  Against the rules.
When some miners have some trouble with some Draeu (cannibals!), it falls to Durango and a rag-tag group of regulators to help them, completely unaware that their long-shot mission will have an impact on the entire planet.

Does all of that make sense?


Without hearing about the starred and positive reviews, I probably wouldn't have picked up this book.  Don't get me wrong, I love sci-fi.  I love humor.  I love adventure.  I don't like the title.

Everytime I read "Black Hole Sun" I inevitably get the Soundgarden song stuck in my head.  The Soundgarden song that I don't know most of the lyrics to.  It's a wee bit annoying.  "Black hole sun!  Black hole sun!  Won't you come and wash away the raaaain," or whatever.  It's a bit whiney for my taste.  Plus it gives me flashbacks to middle school.  Not a good time for me.  Ugh.




But after I got beyond the title of flashbacks and whiney song, I really enjoyed this book.  There is so much action that it's hard to put the book down.  The banter between Durango and Mimi, the A.I. implant, was hilarious.  (But I was confused.  Mimi can read Durango's thoughts.  That's fine.  But can only Durango hear her when she speaks?  I thought so, but toards the end of the book, I swear, someone else responds to one of Mimi's comments and I got confused.  The book never explains this.)

I didn't want to stop reading, even though as far as 80 pages in, much of the background of the culture, weird sci-fi terms and Durango's own story were still unexplained (meaning this book would have been a wee bit frustrating for YA readers who aren't already fond of sci-fi).

I found that Durango reminded me a lot of Captain Mal from the Firefly series/Serenity movie.  And at other moments, I was reminded of Han Solo.  These certainly aren't bad comparisons for readers looking for a new bad boy sci-fi role model or crush (or am I the only nerd who is regularly on the search for a new bad boy sci-fi crush?  Any one?).

Here's a chart comparing our three boys.  Because I can:

While I liked Durango as a character and the tension he dealt with as he was in love with someone he worked but couldn't date due to his belief in The Tenets, or the strict code of conduct for being a regulator, I had a lot of trouble understanding the motives of the maaaaaaaaaaaaany girls in his life.

I guess I kind of understood Vienne, mostly because I just though of her as being a teenage version of Zoe from Firefly.

But the others, one minute one is flirting with Durango, the next moment she's weeping and I did not understand the change.  I suppose I could put on happy rose-colored glasses and argue I was fully in Durango's "guy" perspective, but I tend to think I could have used a little more character development with some of the secondary characters.


Dinner Conversation:


"Now come the mousies nosing out their hole, thinks Kuhru as he wipes fresh bone marrow from his snout.  Three pretty little mousies.  Humans.  Females.  Ripe and soft and full of warm blood.  He shudders.  It will be ecstasy to hunt them down" (p. 1).

"Mars stinks.  From the depths of its rock quarries to the iron-laden dirt that covers the planet's crust, it has a pungent, metallic tang that you can taste in your mouth.  And it isn't just the soil.  Our polluted air is poisoned with the stink of human waste and burning fuel.  The terraformed oceans stink; the newborn rivers reek; as do the lakes, which spew a perpetual efflux of sulfur.  The whole planet is a compost heap, intentionally designed to rot and burn endlessly so that one day, its air will be completely breathable, and its waters capable of supporting life.  But tonight the stink is so powerful, I can smell it up here.  Ten kilometers above the surface.  Where I'm standing on a small square platform.  Looking straight down.
About to wet myself" (p. 4).

"Trouble always finds me.  People like this, their desperation is inversely proportional to the amount of money in their pockets.  The more they need a Regulator, the less they've got to pay for one.  Not this time.  Not me.  No more charity works.  I need paying clients.  It's the curiosity that kills me.  Miners?  What are miners doing in New Eden?" (p. 55).

"You disappoint me, Jacob."
Here it comes.
"Your biological mother was chosen for her intelligence and physical prowess.  A PhD in molecular biology who was an Olympic swimmer.  The surrogate who birthed you was the finest available.  Your birth was without event.  Your education demanding, your training flawless.  This is not your destiny, Jacob.  It is your destiny to become the leader of Mars, not a common dalit mercenary."
For a moment I say nothing.  Look down and away from his relentless gaze, the way I did as a child.  "You made me a dalit, Father" (pp. 81-82).


Tasty Rating:  !!!!

REVIEW: Tiny Tyrant (Volume Two: The lucky winner)

Trondheim, L. & Parme, F.  Tiny Tyrant:  The Lucky Winner.  New York:  First Second.

62 pages.


Appetizer:  Oh, Tiny Tyrant.  I love you.  You entertain me greatly, King Ethelbert.  But having said that, I am so thankful you are a character in a graphic novel series and that I will never have to parent you or babysit for you.  Ever!

(Side note--Have I ever mentioned that I once had a child I babysat for pull a knife on me.  True story.  I'm no naive newby myself.)

This wee-little king could crush a person's soul, be a bit of a handful and drive people who survived torture without a single tear to weep uncontrollably.

For those of you who didn't see my last post about this graphic novel import, Tiny Tyrant is a collection of ten-page comics about the antics of a tiny little despot in an imaginary country.

In this volume, King Ethelbert is visited by a princess with an annoyingly large vocabulary and needs an interpreter to tell him what she is saying.  In the next story, he is jealous of a game show winner who is going to India and decides to go on the trip instead.  But the king, who is used to opulence, is less than excited about the hotel amenities when he arrives.  The king also has to track down some pirates who are selling his image throughout the country and abroad, battle his cousin for their great aunt's inheritance, "rightsize" the world so that the world fits him and find the right biographer to write about his life (and create enough excitement for the biographer to write about).

While I have to admit, I laughed out loud less often with this volume than with the first one, I did really like the second to last story, "Rightsizing," in which a scientist finds a way to shrink objects and people to be to the size that King Ethelbert thinks is appropriate.  I thought it really dealt with one of the key tensions of childhood and having to navigate the adult world.  (But unlike other kiddies, King Ethelbert has the power to change the usual adult-favoring power dynamics in his country.)

As, with the first Tiny Tyrant book, I'd recommend this book to third or fourth graders and up.  These books are an age appropriateness nightmare, since the protagonist is six, but include some vocabulary words that adults will have trouble with.

But, since the order that the reader looks at the panels is pretty straight forward, the books can also ease in readers who are still getting used to reading graphic novels.  Some of the vocabulary will still be very advanced, but I remember reading a lot of comics myself and just ignoring the big words.  (Of course, kids who were less lazy and smarter than me, probably looked them up in the dictionary.  Good for those kids.)

I actually just used the first volume of Tiny Tyrant with some of my undergraduate students.  They enjoyed it.  Mostly they seemed confused about what age of student seemed appropriate.  It was kinda cool that such a very practical teacher question was the first to come to their minds.  Makes me a proud teacher.

Also,  I hope they actually start making some of these political-angst-reducing King Ethelbert merchandise:

I would totally by the archery target.


Dinner Conversation:

Tasty Rating:  !!!




On a completely unrelated note.  Tomorrow is the fall readathon.  I've been going a wee-bit crazy with all of the different projects I'm supposed to be working on (thus the general decrease in the number of posts), so I am VERY excited to have a whole day to devote to reading.  I wanted to warn you few but dear readers, because it means that I'll probably be posting every couple of hours tomorrow.  I'll also be hosting a mini-challenge for the participants starting at 11 PM.  So be sure to check back then.

REVIEW: Swim the Fly

Calame, D.  (2009).  Swim the Fly.  Somerville, MA:  Candlewick Press.

345 pages.

Despite the fact that I bought this book almost a year ago and it took me until now to finally read it, Swim the Fly has a special place in my heart.  My Few But Dear Readers, I used to swim the fly:

Okay, so that photo actually isn't of me.  Mostly because I was waaay too lazy to go through my parents many drawers of photos (The Father has always considered himself to be a bit of a photographer) and scan in a real photo of myself.  It was much easier to do a google image search for "swim butterfly."

For those of you who cannot properly interpret my-lack-of-art-skills, the above image is a recreation of the time I swam the 100 Fly at Nationals, right after I'd eaten my way through the great white shark that had accidentally been released into the pool through a faulty drainage system.  I won the gold that year.  Mostly because none of the other swimmers were willing to swim through the shark blood and bits that my awesome kicks sent flying all over the Olympic-sized pool.

Make sense now?

Just to reiterate, no, the shark did not eat me.  I am the tough one here.  Not the shark.  The shark is weak.  I am a shark eater (This was a few months before I went vegetarian).  Which brings me to the "Fear Me!" tattoo I've had since I was seven.  The Mother and The Father thought the other second graders (who could already read "big" words) should be warned about my temperament.

Appetizer:  Despite the fact that Matt and his two best friends, Coop and Sean, have been on the summer swim team for years, none of them are really devoted to the sport.  Or to being athletic.  But after the three have promised to see a *real* girl completely naked by the end of the summer and after a new girl, Kelly, who is known for having dated the fastest butterfly swimmer in the division, has joined the team, Matt finds himself volunteering to swim the fly in the hopes of winning Kelly's affection and accomplishing his summer goal.

The problem?  Matt can't even finish one lap of butterfly, let alone compete.  He begins to try different fitness regimens that are both painfully awkward and awkwardly painful (but hilarious for the reader) to get ready for the championship meet at the end of the summer.

To complicate matters, as the three boys make their first attempt at planning to see a particular popular girl naked, they are caught by Sean's sister and her friend.  Now not only do they have their own promise to each other, but they also have to contend with blackmail.

Plus, Matt has to deal with his grandfather's problems along with his own.  Matt's parents are divorced and his Grandpa Arlo lives with him, his mom and brother, Peter.  The grandfather reminded me a lot of Grandma Mazur from the Stephanie Plum series, since he was such a fun and strong personality.  Grandpa Arlo is trying to woo the widow who lives across the street.  And for some reason, Grandpa's plans always seem to involve Matt's help.

This book is freakin' hilarious--laugh out loud multiple time, not just snort or chuckle once FUNNY.  There were so many amusing scenes that stuck with me, I can't even claim one to be my favorite.  (*Slight spoilers for the first-half of the book in the rest of this paragraph*)  Was it the time Grandpa Arlo had Matt roleplay being the widow he wanted to ask out?  Maybe.  Was it the scene when Matt accidentally joined a swimmer survival course and wished for death?  Possibly.  The scene when Matt was dressed in drag and really had to use the bathroom, but wound up running into his crush outside the bathroom stall, and Kelly tried to figure out whether she knew this familiar-looking girl from ballet?  Actually, no.  That scene was so embarrassing for poor Matt I tried to block it out.  And those are just in the first third of the book, so I'm not giving much away.

Swim the Fly is an excellent recommendation as a funny YA boy book.  Calame seems to be one of those super-sadistic authors who excels at making their protagonists suffer in awkward and embarrassing ways.  I mean, all authors have to be mean to their characters, breaking them up with their loves, sending their parents away, not letting them make some team, even orchestrating the occasional murder and causing every other form of suffering the author can imagine.  But Calame tortures Matt.  This, of course, translates to more fun for the readers and more sympathy for Matt.

I really enjoyed how bad, awful, terrible, horrible, no good Matt was at swimming the fly.  This boy would drown if his only way out of a bathtub was to do a couple of strokes of the butterfly.  As someone who suffered through swimming the fly every practice and every meet for about ten years, I like that the book shows respect for those of us who can swim the fly.  But having said that, I also had trouble understanding exactly how awful Matt was.  Why does he not improve?  He is practicing.  Do his arms and legs actually tear from his body when he tries to swim, leaving only his torso and head to slowly sink to the bottom of the pool?  I do not understand.

The friendships among Matt, Coop and Sean are believable.  Although, at moments, they did feel a little immature (but that's probably just my own mature "girl-ness" speaking).  I dated my first boyfriend when we were both fourteen and I like to imagine he'd grown beyond doing some of the weird challenges that this trio torture/amuse one another with.  But I'm guessing The First Ex-Boyfriend had similar ridiculous antics at some point.  He probably just didn't want to tell me about them.  Which was wise.  And I'm not about to call and ask now.  Little awkward.

There's quite a bit of bathroom humor--first there's poop, then there's vomit with fish bits.  And later on there are farts.  Fake farts.  Real farts.  Farts.  Farts.  Farts.  Good icky times.  It kind of reminded me of a somewhat-more-appropriate, PG-13 version of the American Pie movies.  (The original ones.  I don't dare let the straight-to-DVD ones potentially suck out my soul.)  Matt has a way of getting into embarrassing situations that is similar to Jim's tendency to get into sexually awkward horrifying situations in the movie franchise.

As a nerd, it was hard not to read this book in terms of the way gender was presented.  There's a lot of transgressing of those traditional gender line-thingies (usually with the consequence of embarrassment and humor...which it could be argued just reaffirms the traditional norms.  Maybe).  Even Grandpa Arlo notes the blur between modern gender norms when he sees Matt wearing an exfoliating mask:

"It's a mud mask."  I touch the thick hard plaster on my cheeks.  "It's supposed to help your complexion.  I wasn't expecting to see anyone."

"Oh, that's your excuse?  What else are you doing when you aren't expecting to see anyone?  Painting your nails, maybe?  Shaving your legs?

"Mom got it for me."

He frowns.  "There used to be such a clear line between boys and girls.  I don't know what the hell's happening to the world" (p. 217). 

There's also a cross-dressing scene (Sidenote--speaking as a girl who has helped a guy disguise himself as a girl during her teen years, there is nothing quite as much fun.  Yay for putting makeup on guys!).  Most of the girls are described in terms of their physical attributes (and not always the best aspects of their appearances--veins and sideburns are occasionally mentioned).  And while some of the girl characters are sexualized, I never felt that Matt and his friends were complete horn-dogs.  Horny puppies, maybe.

Every now and then their voracious, little, horny puppy drives took over and they learned that they were horny were-puppies who could transform into awkward peeping toms when they thought they had a chance at seeing a real naked girl without her knowledge.  The boys do realize being peeping toms is not ideal....

But they do it anyway, unable to stop their horny were-puppy nature.  (Also, why hasn't anyone written a YA novel including were-puppies?!  They'd be cute!  I want my were-puppies!)

So, on the stalker scale the book must go!

You'll notice that Swim the Fly is waaaaay down there in the "barely creepy" realm of stalkerdom.

It would seem that a sequel to Swim the Fly came out just last week.  Beat the Band follows the exploits of one of Matt's best friends, Coop, as he is paired with a girl on a sex-ed assignment.

And I'm guessing at some point there will be a drum set.  And it will be on fire.  Not metaphorically.  But really on fire.  In a purple room.  Show of hands, who thinks I'm right?

I will, of course, be reading it.  I love drum sets that have been set on fire.  If we're lucky, it'll be before next September (when undoubtably there will be a book released from Sean's perspective  I'm on to you, Don Calame!  Maybe).

*Sigh* I take one book off the giant mountain of books that have to be read, only to add another.  (I suppose I should be thankful, usually the conservation of energy sciency principle isn't quite so fair, since if the mountain of books were ever to topple, it would crush my pour little body and tear me limb from limb one paper cut at a time.  Now there's a fun image.)


Dinner Conversation:


"Movies don't count," Cooper says.  "The internet doesn't count.  Magazines don't count.  A real, live naked girl.  That's the deal.  That's our goal for the summer."
"Been there, done that," Sean says.
"Taking baths with your sister doesn't count, either," Sean."  Cooper snorts" (p. 1).

"Don't you get it?  You have to follow the natural way of things.  It's like that picture in our bio textbook.  First there's the monkey.  Then there's the caveman.  Than there's the human.  It's the same with sex.  First there's Internet porn, then there's seeing your first real naked girl, and finally its the dirty deed.  You do want to have sex someday, don't you, Matt?" (p. 2).

"Without thinking, I look over at Kelly.  She turns and our eyes connect.  She pulls the lollipop from her mouth and smiles.  I smile back.  Her eyes are so clear, so green.  They're the color of the water you see in those travel pictures.  Where the man and woman are snorkeling and they're holding hands, and it's like they're the only two people in the world.
Kelly looks away, like she's shy or something.  Still smiling.  Her neck flushes slightly.
"Come on people," Ms. Luntz says.  "Who is the hero here?  Who is going to challenge themselves?  Who is going to swim the fly?"
And it's like some force outside of me suddenly grabs my right arm and thrusts my hand high into the air, and the words tumble out of my mouth before I know what's going on.
"I'll do it."
The entire team turns and looks at me.  I feel my face get hot.
"Matt Gratton?" Ms. Luntz coughs like she's got a fleck of popcorn stuck in her throat.  "Well.  That's...unexpected.  But I guess...we don't have any other option" (pp. 24-25).

"There's something exciting about taking control of your life.
One breath in, two breaths out.
Setting your mind and then following through.
One breath in, two breaths out.
It makes you feel powerful.  Like you can do anything you want.
On breath in and--
Gack!  Fthew!  Goddamn it!
A bug just flew up my nose.  And it's buzzing like crazy.  I exhale hard and a bee comes shooting out of my left nostril, flying off unsteadily.
I've lost my breathing pattern ow, and the full force of how badly out of shape I am hits me" (p. 49).

"Do you know what the consequences are for trespassing and for impersonating a country club member?"
"No," I say, looking back down, but I have a feeling he's about to tell me.
Ulf stands and smiles.  "You have two choices, Mr. Gratton:  my class.  Or jail.  What will it be?"
I hesitate, because it's a tough choice.  I've never been to jail, but it's hard to imagine it's much worse than this class.  Still, I can't go to prison.  Mom would be pissed.  "Your class, I guess," I say finally" (p. 153).


Tasty Rating:  !!!!

REVIEW: Powerless

Cody, M.  (2009).  Powerless.  New York:  Alfred A. Knopf.

277 pages.

So, I've been dropping the ball when it comes to remembering to read and review middle grade novels.  Of course I love them dearly, but with realizing I wanted to write YA full-time, novels for younger readers have been forgotten in the middle of my to-be-read piles.  (Picturebooks, however, I'm doing better at keeping up on, if only due to the fact that they are usually a short 32 pages and faster reads)

But, I will fail you no longer, middle grade books!  It is time to show some love again.  Starting with a superhero book!

First off, I really liked the cover of this book.  I thought the falling superhero did a good job of presenting the content.  The colors and the fact that the superhero resembles a toy will attract the targeted age of male readers.  But of course, I am not an easily swayed reader.  I chose to read this book for other reasons too.

For those of you who don't KNOW ME, know me, I LURVE superheroes.  I used to be in the closet about my love for Batman, Wolverine, Rogue, Spiderman back in the day, but NO MORE!  Say it loud, say it proud.  I love superheroes and the fun lil' adventures they have.

I had a crush on Batman for most of grade school.  I designed my own costume (called the Ravin) and one night I tearfully informed my parents that I was going to become a superhero and that they should be prepared to assist in my plans to fight crimes.  (I imagined they would serve some "Alfred" type role, for which their first duty would be to raise the funds for me to afford similar weapons to those that Batman had.  As well as invent a new vehicle that would take me around the country in a matter of minutes to fight crime.  Even then I grasped that my Michigan hometown didn't have much in the way of supervillains.)

I'm always looking for new takes on superheroes.  So, when I heard that Powerless is about a town of superpowered kids who all lose their powers and memories of their powers when they turn 13, I had to investigate.

Fun!  Right?


Appetizer:  Noble's Green is the safest town in the world.  And it's all due to the young superheroes that live there.  But when those heroes turn thirteen, they lose their superpowers.  It's up to the new boy in town, Daniel, who is powerless, to figure out why.

Daniel, his little brother and parents have all moved to town to help his grandmother who is losing her battle to cancer.  He adjusts to town quickly, making both friends and enemies.  But he can't help but notice that some of the kids...well, they seem to be able to do impossible things, like reach Daniel's little brother more quickly than oncoming traffic, or save Daniel when he is bullied off the side of a mountain (true story).


So, to begin the story, the reader is first presented with Michael's experience of flying (which is awesome!) and then the story shows Michael forgetting about his superpower on his thirteenth birthday.  And then AND THEN the story introduces Daniel, the new kid in town, who is the protagonist for the rest of the story.
And while Michael appears for one scene mid-book, he kinda disappears from the story...forever.

I didn't know how I felt about this run-around to finally meet Daniel.  I'd been prepared to spend the next 260 pages with Michael.  So, the shift surprised me.  And since the reader witnesses another superhero turn thirteen later in the text, I wasn't certain the Michael bits were even necessary.

On top of that, I had some SERIOUS trouble getting into this book at first.  Have you noticed that it's been listed on my Goodreads "Currlently Reading" list for like, three weeks?  I kept getting distracted by other books, movies, bits of paper.  Of course, that sounds tragically awful, to say that a book was "put down-able."  I'd rather focus on the fact that I kept picking it back up.  (This is not always the case with me.  Technically I began reading Terry Pratchett's Nation in January...I'm still on page 50-something.  You all should start placing bets on whether I'll ever finish that one.  I finally decided to take out out of the Goodreads "currently reading" shelf, because I figured you, my few readers, would assume that I'd slipped off the curve of the planet if I didn't note some change.)

Now, you could argue that the first 100 pages are essential.  They show Daniel making friends and being bullied.  Those pages show how fun having superpowers can be, allowing the reader to have fun with the characters as they play a super-powered version of hide-and-seek.

But personally, I only got into the book once we started seeing the bad guy.  He kind of had an eerie Voldemort in Sorcerer's Stone vibe:

"It was dark inside, and through the open window Daniel smelled something new--a pungent odor, like burnt hair.  As he peered over the ledge, a blast of cold air hit him in the face and he saw a hooded shape standing in the darkness.  It was tall, like an adult, but only vaguely human-shaped.  In the blackness of Simon's room, this figure stood out in its absence of light--a thing darker than the dark itself" (p. 107).

Cool right?  That's pretty much when I got hooked.

From there on out I became more impressed with the book.  This this fun fear-of-aging tension.  The Supers, as they're called, fear their thirteen birthday (Sidenote--that was actually my bestest birthday ever!  The Dad took me to see my first rated R movie in the theater (Face Off) and I had a birthday sleepover in which we didn't go to sleep until 8 AM.  Good time!).  Turning thirteen is associated with the end of childhood and the loss of freedom.  Plus, there are also a couple of older characters who describe their dislike of having aged.

And on that note, there are also some situations that present class and issues of loss and death that could trigger discussion.  Plus, there are a lot of references to the Sherlock Holmes books.

By the end, I was much more impressed with the book than I thought I would be.  I'm glad I stuck it out.

But having said that, I did have some trouble with the "mystery" aspect of the book.  Daniel is presented as a detective (I liked that), he does research and seeks out someone who may have information on how the Supers' powers are being stolen (also liked), he suspects someone for no particular reason (No!) and then someone kind of hands him the answers he needs (hated!).  Whether or not the information given to him is true remains to be seen, but I just felt like the mystery had already been pronounced dead, shipped off to the morgue and put in its coffin by then.  I think there were a number of red herrings that the author could have used to challenge Daniel and the reader more.

As to whether or not I will be picking up the sequel that will inevitably follow and was hinted at...well, if you have a prognosticating superpower, you can tell me.


Dinner Conversation:

"The wind howled in Michael's ears.  He would be picking bugs out of his hair for days, but he didn't care" (p. 1).

"As he took a step back, he realized that they were all pictures of the same thing, repeated over and over again: the boy soaring above the rooftops or over the mountains or through the clouds.  It was a little frightening.  Though he couldn't remember drawing them, they looked like his--they all had the same awkward hands that he could never get right.  And each one contained the same message written in his own messy scrawl:
You can fly" (pp. 4-5).

"Welcome to Noble's Green, Pennsylvania--The Safest Town on Earth!
The safest town on earth? thought Danile.  Couldn't sound lamer" (p. 11).

"No one keeps their powers past their thirteenth birthday."
"You mean you give up your powers?" asked Daniel.  "Just like that?"
"No, not exactly.  We don't give them up....  The truth is, we got these powers, and we also don't know how we lose them.  But when I wake up on my thirteenth birthday, I will be just like you, and with no memory of ever even having powers.  It all just disappears" (p. 52).

"You're the only one who can save us."
Daniel was stunned, and he was pretty sure that Mollie was crazy.  If the Supers of Noble's Green couldn't stop whatever was happening to them, what could he do?
"But how?  I'm nothing special."
"And that's why you're perfect" (p. 86).

"But the whole idea of being a superhero is not about any of that.  It's about being a better person.  And Johnny is an example that shows me what it is to be brave.  And I'm not even talking about having powers or being a Super or anything.  I'm just talking about being the best person that you can be, and that means not giving in to anger, or fear.  It's what keeps me going" (p. 173).


Tasty Rating:  !!!

REVIEW: Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life

O'Malley, B.L.  (2004).  Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life.  Portland, Or:  Oni Press, Inc.


So, I'm the type of person who likes to read a book before I watch the movie version.  It's not that I'm a book snob (okay, I am a book snob.  But not about this.).  I don't always assume that the book is better.  Rather, I just like to know how a story ends before I reach the ending in the traditional way.  With books I can flip ahead.  That's not so easy in the movie theater.

So, I picked up the first book in the Scott Pilgrim graphic novel series after I heard some good reviews of the movie.


Appetizer:  Scott Pilgrim has a new girlfriend.  He's dating a seventeen-year-old high schooler named Knives.  They met on the bus.

I'm going to interrupt my own review right there.  Speaking as someone who has just transferred beyond the point when she can be declared to be in her "early twenties" (sigh), the thought of a 23-year-old dating a highschooler is the sceeviest thing in the world.  The sceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeviest!  I thought it was icky when I was in high school too.  I always wonder about twenty-somethings that date teens.  My exact question is usually, "Why can't this person get someone closer to their own age?"

So, imagine my love for the character Kim, a friend of Scott's, when she calls him on it:

Whenever anyone does anything, I'm now going to ask, "Are you evil, or are you really happy?"  Like if a student is late for class, "Are you evil or are you really happy?"  If a barista asks me if I want whipped cream on my soy white mocha, I will answer, "Are you evil or are you really happy?"

So, after having rambled about the disturbing age difference, Scott and Knives are really cute together.  She was embarrassed to hold his hand on the bus.  Scott takes Knives to see his band practice and she winds up with stars in her eyes.  Plus, Scott's roommate, Wallace, and all his friends give him a hard enough time that I feel like that the reader won't walk away feeling that such an age difference is a good plan for their own future relationships.

But despite the cuteness, Scott's dreams are haunted by another girl...one he sees around town, one who rollerblades outside in winter.  Scott goes out of his way (spends some of Wallace's money) to meet her and, despite seeming crazy/stalkery manages to snag a date with the mystery girl, Ramona.

Reread that last paragraph.  There was a step missing.  Between being cute with Knives and going out with Ramona, Scott fails to break-up with his current girlfriend.  And I know Knives is all first-romance-naive and Scott is all I-don't-want-to-hurt-her, but his inability to end one relationship before starting another made me like Scott less as a character.  A lot less.

But of course, this inability to break up with Knives comes back to haunt him when he and his band have a gig.  Both Knives and Ramona are there.

Complicating Scott's life further, he's started getting messages from a guy he doesn't know, insisting they have to fight (and what I imagine to be the plot of the movie ensues).  But I don't know for sure--I still haven't seen the movie.  And the book ends with a cliffhanger.

While personally I finished the book feeling only mildly entertained, I can see the appeal.  Scott has a lot of amusing conversations with the (totally awesome!) and less-than-supportive secondary characters.  Scott is a music-loving young guy who has a lot of friends to joke with and who struggles with romance.  I think Scott's experiences reflect the interests of just about every guy I was friends with in high school.  So, I'm definitely keeping this series in mind as a good YA recommendation.  And I was amused enough to request book two (Scott Pilgrim Versus the World) from the library.

So, dear readers, do I read volume two next or give in and see the movie?

Dinner Conversation:


Scott:  Just so I tell you before you hear some dirty lies from someone else, yes, I'm dating a 17-year-old.
Wallace:  Is he cute?
Scott:  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Wallace:  Does this mean we have to stop sleeping together?

Scott:  No, it's cool.  Chill out.  It's like in Trainspotting [, dating a teenager].
Wallace:  Okay, first of all, in Trainspotting, remember how he was freaking out and all worried?  That was because he knew it was sick and wrong and illegal.  Secondly, remember how she was coercing him into dating her?
Scott:  No, Dude, it's not like that at all.
Wallace:  You just said it was like that!
Scott:  Okay, maybe I didn't watch that movie very carefully.

Ramona:  Um, I guess you have to fight my--seven?--evil ex-boyfriends.  Um, if you want to like, date me.
Scott:  Seven evil ex-boyfriends?
Ramona:  Six or seven.
Scott:  You dated seven evil dudes?
Ramona:  Not all at once.


Tasty Rating:  !!!

(Kinda) Review: Mockingjay

So, I'm having trouble putting my thoughts about Mockingjay into words.

But since I did review both The Hunger Games and Catching Fire, I couldn't just ignore Mockingjay.

So, my thoughts are below.  Be warned on two counts, few but dear readers:  I ramble and there are spoilers.

Collins, S.  (2010).  Mockingjay.  New York:  Scholastic.

390 pages.

Appetizer:  For those of you not in the know, Mockingjay is the final installment in The Hunger Games trilogy.  The books follow a teenage girl named Katniss who takes the place of her younger sister in a televised fight to the death among children and teens from poor districts for the amusement of the rich Capitol.

Mockinjay is set during the districts' rebellion against the capitol.  Katniss is now seventeen and must decide whether she wants to accept the role of becoming the "mockingjay" or the face of the rebellion and encourage the people to rebel.

As you can imagine, it's very dramatic.  Dark.  Beautifully written.  Tense.  Dark.  Captivating.  And dark.

As a whole, the Hunger Games books have done an AMAZING job of capturing the interest of students who generally don't like to read ever.  I've had undergraduates admit that they started reading for fun again because of The Hunger Games.  It is so exciting to see.

Having said all of this, I had some trouble with Mockingjay.

I was fine for the first two-thirds of the book.  As with the other books, I enjoyed Katniss's emotional struggle with what she has done and what has been done to her.  I loved the realization that it is through Katniss's authentic-ness that she won over people to her cause.  I thought it was tragic what Peeta had to endure while held prisoner by the Capitol.  I liked that Gale finally had more of a role.  I also liked that the hunger games became a metaphor for the larger battles in Katniss's life.  I liked some of the new characters introduced (Boggs!).  Although, I was very disappointed that some other characters disappeared from the story entirely after a quick sentence that they'd died tragically.

My big problem was....

WE INTERRUPT THIS POST TO REMIND YOU THAT THERE ARE SOME BIG SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!!!!!

My big problem was with when Katniss became a soldier.  As she and others traveled through the capitol to reach President's Snow's mansion I was more reminded of the movie Black Hawk Down than a YA novel.  I was fine with the messages about war and peace that were included, but I felt like those messages were shared at the expense of a story I had been captivated by up until that point.

And with the Katniss's uncertainty over who to trust--Snow or Coin--I couldn't help but be reminded of the Chaos Walking series.  And to be honest, I thought that book did a better job of constructing foils between leadership styles and the conclusion that pretty much all war leaders aren't exactly super-awesome-straight-forward peeps who will be content with only a tiny taste of power.

I also had a lot of trouble with the bombs that were sent down in little parachutes in front of the president's mansion and who those explosions killed.  After the ending of that chapter, I honestly thought the following seven or eight pages were a dream sequence.  Honestly.  It wasn't just that I didn't want to believe what had happened had...happened.  But the language about it as Katniss recovers was just so vague and metaphorical that it made the events hard to believe.

Now, having said all of this.  I did still find the ending of the book to be satisfying.  All my questions were answered and I did feel like (those left alive) could find peace (kinda).

So, yeah, rambling done.

What did all-ya-few-alls think?




Dinner Conversation:

"I stare down at my shoes, watching as a fine layer of dust settles on the worn leather. This is where the bed I shared with my sister, Prim, stood.  Over there was the kitchen table.  The bricks of the chimney, which collapsed in a charred heap, provide a point of reference for the rest of the house.  How else could I orient myself in this sea of gray?" (p. 3).

"I'm going to be the Mockingjay" (p. 31).

"And now Coin, with her fistful of precious nukes and her well-oiled machine of a district, finding it's even harder to groom a Mockingjay than to catch one.  But she has been the quickest to determine that I have an agenda of my own and am therefore not to be trusted.  She has been the first to publicly brand me as a threat" (p. 59).


Tasty Rating:  ????????  Two stars, four stars...I can't decide.  Internets, help me make sense of how I feel about this book!

REVIEW: Monsters of Men

Ness, P.  (2010).  Chaos Walking:  Monsters of Men.  London:  Walker Books.

9781406310276

603 pages.


Appetizer: This is the final book in Ness's Chaos Walking trilogy.
 
Let me tell you, I had a PAIN of a time remembering exactly what had happened when the last book ended.  In fact, I had a bit of a conversation with myself trying to figure it out:

The dog died?
No that was midway through book one.  ...And that SUCKED.
They arrived at the town?
End of book one and start of book two.  Have you completely forgotten about The Ask and the Answer?
That one undying dude falling over a waterfall?
Book two...some time?  Book one?  No, two, I think
Oh, right, right, right.  The main dude was working for the bad guys and what's-her-name was working for the healers.
Yes, but that's not the ending.
Kay, whatever.  This book is over 600 pages.  Peeps are fighting.  Remember the sides as you go.  Just start reading!

Monsters of Men picks up right when the last book left off.  Thus causing my above conversation with...me.  Of course, had I read beyond the first two paragraphs I would have realized the following paragraphs would summarize the impending dramas.

And by "impending dramas," I mean war.  The first 70 pages or so go back and forth quickly between the points of view of Todd (who is preparing to fight an army of Spackle) and Viola (who is going to tell the arriving humans the truth of the planet's situation).  It's an intense, don't you dare put this book down, section of text.

There's also a third perspective given voice in this book, that of 1017, the only surviving Spackle from the execution of all the Spackle slaves.  While a little confusing at moments, the character has a strong voice.

As I was reading the book, my mind kept going to World War II.  There are a lot of parallels in terms of a genocide, forming alliances, deciding whether not to drop bombs, etc.  Of course, the fact that the Spackle employ guerrilla tactics draws parallels to the Vietnam War.  Lots of wars.

There were also a lot of character foils.  You can compare Todd to the Mayor.  Todd to Lee.  The Mayor to Ben.  Todd to 1017.  Viola to 1017.  Viola to Mistress Coyle.  And on and on.

The pacing of the book is very impressive.  Throughout the entire series, Ness has known how to keep the pressure on (although a portion of the second book did drag for me a little).  In this book there are waves of intenseness that make you go "Oh, shiz!  Can't stop reading."  But even during the calmer moments, the story is building tension for that next wave of chaos.  As a writer, it'd be worth studying how Ness accomplishes this so well.

The end of the book, of the series, is a satisfying one.  As a whole, I don't like to think of this trilogy as a series.  I think the story is really just one ginormous, gigundo, HUGE book.  An INTENSE ginormous, gigundo, huge book.


Dinner Conversation:

"War," says Mayor Prentiss, his eyes glinting.  "At last."
"Shut up," I say.  "There ain't no at last about it.  The only one who wants this is you."
"Nevertheless," he says, turning to me with a smile.  "Here it comes."
And of course I'm already wondering if untying him so he could fight this battle was the worst mistake of my life--" (p.1).

"I only ever been down here once, when I ran thru it the other way with Viola in my arms, carrying her down the zigzag road when she was dying, carrying her into what I thought was safety, but all I found was the man riding by my side, the man who killed a thousand Spackle to start this war, the man who tortured Viola for informayshun he already knew, the man who murdered his own son--
"And what other kind of man would you want leading you into battle?" he says, reading my Noise.  "What other kind of man is suitable for war?"
A monster, I think, remembering what Ben told me once.  War makes monsters of men" (pp. 10-11).

"He is worse than the others, I show.  He is worst of all of them.
Because-
Because he knew he was doing wrong.  He felt the pain of his actions-
But he did not amend them, shows the Sky.
The rest are worth as much as their pack animals, I show, but worst is the one who knows better and does nothing" (p. 84).

"And if you didn't make personal decisions, you wouldn't be a person.  All war is personal somehow, isn't it.  For somebody?  Except it's usually hate" (p. 288).


Tasty Rating:  !!!!

REVIEW: Knights of the Lunch Table: The Dragon Players

Cammuso, F.  (2009).  Knights of the Lunch Table:  The Dragon Players.  New York:  Scholastic.

0439903238

127 pages.


Appetizer: In the sequel to the original Knights of the Lunch Table, a little time has passed.  Artie is now comfortably friends with Percy and Wayne, but the Horde are still causing trouble.  As Artie and his friends prepare for a "Dragon Duel" robot competition as a part of the Dragon Day celebration, their main competition is the Horde of bullies and Artie's own decision about whether or not he'll cheat to win the prize Wayne needs to escape Principal Dagger's clutches after an incident in which his bowling ball met her shiny car.

So, I originally wasn't going to review this book.

It seemed to lose some of the focus on re-presenting Arthurian legend that the first book had (which actually seemed a little heavy handed...I also had to reread that book this week.  It's been a busy week o' the graphic here.).  The plot of the sequel also seemed less focused.  Percy was avoiding Artie.  Morgan, Artie's sister is trying to give his toys away to charity.  All of these things do contribute to the overall story, of course.  I just felt like it took some time to get there.

Also, some of the illustrations were a little harder to decipher.  Take this page for example.  Which one is Artie's sister, Morgan and which is his Mom:

It took me several extra glances to figure it out.  All of this was of course triggered by the thought, "Why would Artie's mom give him the extra hot wings?"  Then after five minutes..."Oh wait, that smile's more of a sneer and the bangs are parted in a different way.  How could I not notice sooner?"

But then I came to the end of the graphic novel.

And I decided I HAD to review it.

You see, one of my big problems with the first book was the ending.  The way Artie defeats The Horde in a dodgeball championship can kinda-sorta be construed as cheating.  I had a problem with it and so did some of my students.

The Dragon Players seems almost to address that complaint directly.  Once again, Artie goes on a quest to find a way to defeat Joe and the Horde, but when he realizes that his plan is cheating, he must, ahem, choose between feeding those two internal dragons that we all know so well:

Artie:  "Two Dragons?"
Mr. Merlyn:  "Sure.  One stands for what's right:  sharing, kindness, compassion, and truth.  The other stands for all the bad stuff like fear, anger, greed, and deceit.  And those dragons are always fighting."
Artie:  "So which dragon wins?"
Mr. Merlyn:  "The one you feed the most."

It all makes more sense in context.

I just liked that it felt like Cammuso was going back and addressing the critique of the first book.  It made me happy.  Mmmm, happy.


Dinner Conversation:

 Mom:  What are you two doing?!
Morgan:  I'm collecting junk for a charity auction at school on Dragon Day.  It's for my cheerleading squad.
Artie:  She's stealing my stuff! (p. 8).

Wayne:  Where are we going to get $300?
Percy:  What do you mean we?
Wayne:  It wasn't just my fault [the bowling ball threw Principal Dagger's windshield]!
Percy:  Since when is your bowling ball our responsibility?
Artie:  We all had a hand in it.  We're in this together.  We are Knights, after all (p. 29).

Miss Flunke:  People say that on Dragon Eve, a dragon roams the town looking for a sacrifice.  If you are outside past dark, he will swoop down and take you away.  Just thinking about it gives me the creeps.
Mr. Merlyn:  Yes, well, Dragon Day has changed from a day kids fear to one they enjoy.  It is still about sacrifice.  That's why we're having a charity auction.  So people can donate some of their belongings to a good cause.  But it's also about having fun and laughing at what makes you scared" (p. 31).

Percy:  The Dragon Duel?  It's boring!  Every year, teams build remote-controlled robots, then let 'em loose in battle.  The toughest robot wins.  How stupid.
Artie:  It sounds cool to me!  (p. 34)



Tasty Rating:  !!!

REVIEW: American Born Chinese

Yang, G.L.  (2006).  American Born Chinese.  New York:  First Second.

1596431520

233 pages.

So, I recently had to reread American Born Chinese and I figured I may as well write a review this time around.


Appetizer: American Born Chinese shares the story of the Monkey King who has been excluded from a party by the other gods, Jin Wang who is having trouble adjusting to being one of the few Chinese-American student at his new school and his friendship with a "fresh off the boat" new student named Wei-Chen.  AND it's the story of Danny, who seems like the typical white-American teen, who must suffer through a visit from his (intentionally) stereotypical cousin, Chin-Kee.

It's a lot of stories, my friends.

Rereading the graphic novel, I was impressed by how expertly woven the themes and images of identity, inclusion exclusion and transformation are.  Lots of details all add to the overarching significance.  I can see why this pretty-baby won the Printz award (and thereby made a name for graphic novels everywhere)!.

I really like how vivid Yang's illustrations are throughout the graphic novel.  At the same time, his style is relatively simple, faces are made up of clear shapes, that seventh and eighth graders would be able to copy to create their own sketches (if they wished).  I like how essential the images are to make meaning.  It actually made it hard to pull quotes for this review, since the characters' expression really contribute to the meaning of the dialogue and narration.

For better or worse (worse!), this graphic novel did give me a flashback to grade school. At one point, Chin-Kee sings the rhyme "Me Chinese, Me play joke, Me go pee-pee in his coke" (p. 118).  I can remember hearing this in grade school.  From what I remember it was just a fun rhyme (I liked the pee-pee part), there was no consideration of the inherent racism.  I didn't think to myself, "why this runs counter to the treat everyone with respect, we're all equal" type of messages that I heard during school.  Although I probably wouldn't use this book with two many groups of middle graders, I do wish someone would have taken up this moment in the book and rhyme when I was in high school.  It presents a valuable opportunity to reflect and consider the more subtle racisms that go down on the playgrounds and in the halls.

One of the chief difficulties of this graphic novel is the fact that the chapters are seemingly unrelated to one another.  That's actually not the case.  And it turns out that some characters are the same person, but in disguise.  But there are few to no hints of this until the end of the book, when suddenly you're given this moment of "Woah, wait..." and you have to mentally go back and see if all the parts of the story still make sense together (they do!  But it's a bit of mental gymnastics to get there).  But some readers may not like going to all the trouble of integrating all the separate pieces into one whole.

American Born Chinese can also do an excellent job of beginning conversation on Chinese mythology, racial stereotypes, racism, Americanization, identity and on and on.


Dinner Conversation:

"One bright and starry night, the gods, the goddesses, the demons, and the spirits gathered in heaven for a dinner party" (p. 7).

Guard:  " Look.  You may be a king--you may even be a deity--but you are still a monkey" (p. 15).

"It's easy to become anything you wish...so long as you're willing to forfeit your soul" (p. 29).

Ma:  "I have some exciting news!  Guess who's coming to visit!"
Danny:  "Who?"
Ma:  Your cousin Chin-Kee!"


Tasty Rating:  !!!!

REVIEW: Gregor the Overlander

Collins, S.  (2004).  Gregor the Overlander.  New York:  Scholastic.

0439678137

311 pages.


Appetizer: 11-year-old Gregor is facing a hot, boring summer in New York City, watching his grandma and one of his little sisters, Boots.  His mom works all day and his dad had mysteriously disappeared several years ago.

But, when Boots falls into a large open duct along the wall behind the dryer in the basement laundry room of their apartment building, Gregor has no choice but to follow her.  The siblings fall into a mysterious underland where cockroaches, bats and rats are giant, the people have never seen the sun and where, Gregor quickly learns, it's much easier to arrive than to escape.  Looks like his summer has taken a turn for the interesting.

Okay, so I'm in love with The Hunger Games trilogy that Collins wrote after the Underland Chronicles.  And since I'd heard good things about it, I figured it was my duty to pick up this series as well.  But while by the same author, who still writes in clear and action-packed prose--I mean, can the woman end a chapter without there being some kind of plot twist/moment of emotional "ooh"?--The Underland Chronicles will really appeal to middle grade boys.  I'm guessing the giant cockroaches, spiders and rats will entertain.  And the fact that Collins includes real behavioral and biological features when she describes the animals will amuse even more.

I particularly like Gregor the Overlander because quite a few of the initial interactions and misunderstandings revolve around cultural misunderstandings.  This can help prepare students or open up discussion about experiencing another culture.

I also like that the book explores what it is to be a hero/warrior and the sense of determinism that can arise when characters must worry about fulfilling a prophecy.  Between the prophecy, quests, and links between the giant bats and their human riders, the book feels like it is the underground baby of The Lord of the Rings series and Avatar.  Seriously!  (Never mind that Gregor came out long before Avatar.  It's still its baby.  Don't ask me about the math!).

I do have one small complaint though.  I didn't like that the protagonist's name was Gregor and one of the antagonists was named King Gorger.  Gregor.  Gorger.  Gregor.  Gorger.  Knowing Collins, this may have been intentional.  But since I tend to focus on the first and last letters as I read names, there were a few moments of confusion.

Also, as a warning, there are multiple character deaths in the book.  As a rule, the characters who die aren't the ones the reader is expected to love the most, but they're also not nameless, faceless, motionless rocks in the background either.  (But how unexpected would that be?!  If a rock died?!  Those kids don't even breathe!  Nobody would see it coming!)

The next book in the series is Gregor and the Prophecy of Bane.  While it won't be able to fight its way to the top of my book pile, it'll still make the pile, which is saying something.


Dinner Conversation:

"Gregor had pressed his forehead against the screen for so long, he could feel a pattern of tiny checks above his eyebrows.  he ran his fingers over the bumps and resisted the impulse to let out a primal caveman scream" (p. 1).

"As he reached the far wall, a strange scene confronted him.
The metal grate to an old air duct was wide open, secured by two rusty hinges at the top.  Boots was squinting into the opening, about two feet by two feet, which led into the wall of the building.  From where he stood, Gregor could see nothing but blackness.  Then a wisp of...what was it?  Steam?  Smoke?  It didn't really look like either  Some strange vapor drifted out of the hole and curled around Boots.  She held out her arms curiously and leaned forward.
"No!" yelled Gregor as he lunged for her, but Boots's tiny frame seemed to be sucked into the air duct.  Without thinking, Gregor thrust his head and shoulders into the hole.  The metal grate smacked into his back.  The next thing he knew, he was falling down, down, down into empty space" (p. 13).

"All right, okay, I'm talking to a giant cockroach," thought Gregor.  "Be cool, be nice, answer the bug.  He wants to know 'Smells what so good, smells what?' So, tell him."  Gregor forced himself to take a deep sniff and then regretted it.  Only one thing smelled like that.
"I poop!" said Boots, as if on cue.  "I poop, Ge-go!"
"My sister needs a clean diaper," said Gregor, somehow feeling embarrassed." (pp. 18-19).

"It is simple to fall down, but the going up requires much giving."
"What do you mean?" asked Gregor, his throat tightening.
"He means you cannot go home," said Luxa flatly.  "You must stay with us in the Underland."
"Uh, no!  No, thank you!" said Gregor.  "I mean, you're all great, but I've got stuff to do...upstairs!" he said.  "Thanks again!  Nice meeting you!  Come on, Boots!" (p. 36).


"He'd seen movies.  He'd read books.  He didn't in any way resemble any warrior.  First of all, they were grown up and they usually had a lot of special weaponry.  Gregor was eleven and, unless you counted a two-year-old sister as special weaponry, he'd come empty-handed" (pp. 111-112).

"Gregor succeeded in thinking of himself as a warrior.  A bold, brave, powerful warrior that the Underlanders would tell stories about for centuries.  He could almost see himself leading a squadron of bats into battle, stunning the rats, saving the Underland from--
"Ge-go, I pee!"  Announced Boots.
And there he stood, a boy in a goofy hard hat with a beat-up flashlight and a bunch of batteries he hadn't even tested to see if they still had juice.
The mighty warrior excused himself and changed a diaper" (pp. 137-138).




Tasty Rating:  !!!